Thoughts About Family

Last week was Thanksgiving, a time when friends and family members come together to celebrate how thankful they are for what they have and who is a part of their life. I am thankful for the people in my life, friends and family, who have journeyed with me through thick and thin and will continue down the road of life with me, for the memories that we have created, and for the laughs that we have shared, and if you know me I share many laughs with those around me even if they do not laugh too. Recently, actually for a few weeks now, I have been thinking a lot about family and community and although there are strong distinctions between the two, at least for many, the two are interchangeable to me. I am in a class at school (Urban and Community Sociology) where we have been trying to define exactly what community is, and I have found that the term is a very fluid term that has a different meaning for each person. I define community as people who share common interests and depend on each other for survival. That is actually a very simplified version of my definition, but hopefully you will get the point, and it is that definition that causes me to think of community in terms of a family.

My whole concept finally came into existence when I interacted with a couple that comes into the Starbucks where I work regularly did not look to be doing so well on that particular day. I could tell that the woman who came was not doing well because she was not her usual self, instead of looking at me and smiling when I talked to her, she looked at me with tear filled eyes and a semi-smile that told me something had happened. I got them their drinks and pastries and they sat down, it was then that I decided to clean the lobby and talk with them to make sure that they where alright. In doing so I found out that they had had some family issues earlier that day, but they did not wish to divulge the full details of what was going on, so I left the issue with a hug and told them that we would do what we could to help with whatever was going on.

I walked away and continued to sweep and wipe off tables with a huge question resounding in my brain, "Why would they come to Starbucks with these problems going on?" And then it hit me, we all were a part of their family. They wanted to be some place to get their mind off of the subject, some place where they felt comfortable, and where they know people would understand. For those of us that work at that Starbucks, we know their drinks and their names, but more importantly we know more about their lives than many other people do. They have disclosed information about themselves to us because they trust us; they know that our store is more than just serving coffee to people, we are there to brighten their day. They associate our faces and our store as being within their community; to them we are more than just people who make coffee, we are members of their family.

During this holiday season, I challenge all of you to look at the places and the people that you interact with daily and see if you would be willing to make them members of your family or if they are just people that you meet who, in my case, make you coffee. Happy holidays and I hope that when we look at the people around us that we see how connected we are to one another and that our community, our family, is more than just the people around us, it is the connection that we feel with one another.